"Oh dear..."
It wasn't me.
Last night, I had occasion to impugn the largely unearned good name of Exclusive Books of Constantia Village, my dear old mother's shopping centre of choice (see addendum to post below). My acerbic note was not the first time I've given Exclusive, South Africa's only halfway decent book chain, a slap on the wrist. A couple of years ago, an Exclusive assistant failed to recognise the names of several world-renowned authors, among them Chris Locke and David Weinberger.
I gave them a deserved bloglashing for their inexcusable ignorance.
Some might say I harbour resentment towards the rich and famous frequenting the miserable, prefabricated sprawl constituting Constantia Village. Okay, so what? I do. They have money and I, like the ever-cheerful, well-educated, and predominantly Rwandan car attendants cluttering the parking lot, do not. My income, officially and according to Business Day, lumps me with the working and criminal classes.
Being a good Catholic boy and a communist to boot, I certainly don't mind being classified as such. I know many working-class people and all are my friends. However, my coveting the pecuniary wealth of the rich is something with which the fat cats of Constantia will have to learn to live. It is a natural phenomenon and it is certainly not my fault.
Nor was this morning's fire. Of this I assure you.
"...there goes the village."
Because Wendy and I chose to go walking in the rain yesterday, the weekly shopping was postponed until after I had taken Mother to this morning's Mass, which started at 09:00. And that's where I was when the fire broke out. I was in Newlands; it's nowhere near Constantia. The fire, as News24.com points out, was started by an electrical fault, not human malfeasance. They are correct and should be believed by all who read this.
Besides, the blaze started on the side of the complex furthest removed from Exclusive Books and quite a distance from Pick 'n Pay, where the ceiling fell on several staff and customers a few months back. I left the building shortly before that disaster, which landed several people in hospital but then, as now, had nothing whatsoever to do with it. In fact, after fleeing the scene of this morning's fire, I headed straight for Pick 'n Pay in Claremont, where we did our shopping — unnoticed.
You have to trust me on this. I am innocent of whatever it is somebody might think I've been party to.
What intrigues me is the number of South African buildings, developments, and stores prone to accidents of this nature or, in extreme cases, collapse. We've had shopping malls, holiday apartments, and houses fall to the ground. In fact, houses and roads are now being swallowed whole. Why are the buildings and property of the SUV classes so prone to accident?
It is a vexed question.
I'd look to the insurance industry and town-planning department for an answer were it not for their top people being out of the office, shopping at Constantia Village, eating out at the Waterfront, or holidaying at Jeffrey's Bay.
